Today I have visiting teaching appointments. Unfortunately they are the first in about 5 months. I have a lot of good excuses, wrong numbers, isolation in Primary, sickness, visiting family, vacations, holidays...I have more, need I go on? None of those are really important. Because I haven't been going on appointments I haven't been reading the message. I was preparing for these visits, thinking about the sisters I'd be visiting and what they should hear. Flipping through the Ensign, I was reading titles and snippets from articles trying to reminding myself of the messages we heard in October. We were out East for the General Relief Society Meeting and did not attend. I stopped and read "Happiness, Your Heritage" by President Uchtdorf. As I read tears were brought to my eyes as he spoke to those who were weary. I sometimes feel weary. And I am weary at my own hand. As I've struggled through life I have found that God sometimes won't give us the desires of our hearts-not because he can't but because he won't for our good. These last three years I have been told to wait, and wait and wait for the desires of my heart. And as I've waited, knowing the God has the answers to my questions and will lead me in the best paths, I've become weary with disappointment. As my spiritual well of faith is being drawn upon, I've neglected family and personal scripture study. That has been the cause for my wariness, trying to overcome with prayer alone without utilizing the power of scripture study and fasting. I don't need to fast, study and pray for a change in answer but to have the faith to accept it with happiness. I am grateful for the many blessings the Lord has blessed us with and I am grateful for the Holy Ghost that whispers to our hearts the messages we need to hear. Elder Uchtdorf did not talk about fasting and scripture study in his remarks to the Relief Society, but scripture study and fasting is the message I received. I hope you can find the answers to your questions as you study the General Conference Ensign this month and the months to come.
3 comments:
I love you Erica - you are amazing. You are such an amazing example to me of faith and obedience (among so many other things). I'm really grateful to have you as a friend - I learn so much from you.
Yep....you're Everest alright....perfect name. You have been a great example to many people throughout your life, but especially to me. Thank you so much for making me want to be better. You are wonderful! You're a stud, superstar, superhero....you name it...you go girl!
I completely understand what you are going through. These last 3 years have also been the hardest of my life. Sometimes you think that life is going to go just as planned and then God tells you that you have to keep waiting. As I was reading your post I just started crying. You wrote exactly what I am feeling. Thank you for sharing.
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